Category Archives: Poetry

The ghosts of memories

A brief bit of verse found while sorting through piles of papers in the garage. Written by me (Victoria) sometime in the mid to late 90s:

 

I don’t believe in fates or stars,

so how is it you found me?

You see so much of how I see,

You touch my thoughts so naturally.

You see the sparkles and the tears,

dancing deep within my eyes.

Please forgive me when I’m startled,

by the places that you find,

look gently through the pages of my mind.

 

Courtesy of MysticsArtDesign – Pixabay.

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It is time – past time.

I can’t feel your pain.
I’ve tried, I even thought I knew
How you felt.
Scared
Alone
With nowhere to go,
No safe place to know,
It would all be fine.

I can’t feel your pain.
I’ve tried, by reaching back,
All those years,
When I was abused,
Bullied,
Stalked,
Manipulated,
Frightened, and alone.

I can’t feel your pain.
I’ve been tired,
I’ve been hungry,
Depressed,
Trapped;
Even, yes, even
Had my life threatened.
But I always found a way,
A way to live another day.

Perhaps I understand,
In some small way,
How deep the ache,
How sore
Your soul.
But now I see,
It never goes away.
For you it’s every day.

The air you breathe,
The ground you walk,
Is filled with hate,
And fear,
And terror.
Barely in the shadows,
But growing ever stronger,
Reaching for us all.

As hard as I try,
It seems no more
Than Insult,
to your
Torn,
and battered
Heart,
to say,
I feel your pain.

Perhaps, as small
As it may be,
My voice can help,
My life can show,
That hate
is never,
ever,
ever,
the answer.
For the love of all
Creation has provided,
It is time.

It is time to end the pain.
It is time to be there
For the black,
For the Muslim,
For the gay,
For the PEOPLE,
Of our earth.
One person at a time.

I will do my best.
I will share.
I will talk.
I will try to reach
Minds,
And hearts.
And I will hope.
I will not say,
I feel your pain.
But I will be here.
I will hold you.
And one day, together,
We will find the dawn.

Sunrise 3

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Filed under Humanties for the Unbound Mind, My Journey with Job, Personal Journeys, Poetry

Yahrzeit: A Day of Remembrance

In Jewish tradition one observes the passing of someone close to you four times a year. Yom Kippur, Feast of Tabernacles, Passover, and Feast of Weeks. And then there is the annual remembrance, Yahrzeit. Yahrzeit is observed on the anniversary of a person’s death, using the Jewish calendar. In my case that would be April 17 of this year. My husband was half Jewish but I know his abhorrence for that time of year, so I choose today; the anniversary of his departure on the Gregorian calendar.

To understand the tradition you must know something of the Jewish approach to such things. There are periods of grief, but there are also periods during which the memory of the person is preserved in all of its living grace. A way of learning to treasure those that went before us, and a hope of the path we will follow into some unknown “then.”

I’m not terribly good a formalized prayers, so I have chosen to write a poem. If memory serves it may be the first in a year.

IMG_1631

He left me in the spring.
Not in the dead of winter,
When cold, gray skies surround me.
When days are short,
And love itself,
Huddles ‘neath the rain and snow.

He left me in the spring.
Not in the chill of fall,
When brilliant colors oft betray
Arrival of the frost.
And love itself,
Feels the bite, and seeks the warming hearth.

IMG_1632

He left me in the spring.
Not in the heat of summer,
When days are long and hot.
When the grass grows brown,
And love itself,
With thirst, seeks cool and breezy shadows.

He left me in the spring.
When birds sing, and trees grow green.
When flowers bloom and life awakes.
Perhaps to show me future hope,
When love itself,
Becomes the strength
– to face life on my own.

Deer

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Filed under Personal Journeys, Poetry

Reflections ~ What is a Mind?

The Mind

Did we ever decide, my dear,
What it was that makes a mind?

These last several days, with you
Sometimes intense and sometimes numb.

Moments uplifting, some devastating
And forever to be remembered.

Who were you, my dear,
That I loved you so?

What bit of cosmic consciousness
Merged our paths and bound us so?

Our journey together was both
Long and short, too short.

Heart-wrenching & beautiful
Sometimes stormy, always passionate.

So where, my dear
Have you gone?

Are you off exploring
Your beloved universe?

Arguing with God
As you often did here?

Don’t wander too far,
But if you do

I’ll meet you someday
Deep in the heart of a nearby nebula

Where bright and shining stars
Are born from the dust of yesterdays.

To my beloved shining star, Douglas C. Dorrough

January 13, 1927 ~ March 29, 2015

I will be creating a memorial site for my husband over the next several days.

It will have information regarding appropriate recipients of donations in his honor as well as a history of his life and work.

The link will be added to this site.

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Filed under Caregiving Backstage, Personal Journeys, Poetry

Reflections ~ Paths to the Sea

Oh, the journey that we’re on,

By Fotosearch

By Fotosearch

Good days — bad days —
days that break the heart.
days that seem so wicked
in the hope that they bring.
You slip away,
then gain your strength.
You call me close,
push me away
Dozy
Agitated
Certain you must go
and stay.

Am I crazy to keep trying?
To get us to the sea?
To plan a great safari?
To upend us from our roost?
Perhaps
and yet
I find it all consuming.
If I lose you,
I must keep you
And that can only be
In a place that’s ours
not borrowed
a place that’s by the sea.

And so we pack
And organize
Negotiate
Conspire
To make a journey
Into turmoil
Confusion
Sometimes despair.
All to hold you close
To know you as I do.
To smell the sea,
or mountain air.
A place that I
can care for you
as only I can do.

But where,
my dear
do I pack away
my ever present tears?

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Filed under Caregiving Backstage, Personal Journeys, Poetry

Reflections ~ Bed of Thorns

Today I bought a bed.
A small bed
For a small place
In a room to call my own.

 

It’s “my room”
You say, and invite me in.
To show me a place
That I might lay my head

 

It’s “your room” now
Not ours.
Few pieces of me
Remain.

 

A Push-me Pull-you
In the nightly dance
As I try to see,
Am I welcome – or not?

 

With a heart torn in pieces
I surrender at last
And order a bed
Of my own – just in case.

 

The pain’s only greater
When you don’t remember
It was I you evicted,
And invited last night.

 

In the light of the day
We cling to each other
And you now remember
How much we once loved.

 

And I see our passion,
It’s still burning bright
But imprisoned within
This damned disease.

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Filed under Caregiving Backstage, Personal Journeys, Poetry

Review ~ Wild Woman Waking: Finding the Path to Who You Are

Wild Woman Waking by Morgan Dragonwillow with photography by Tui Snider

Morgacover18n is a dear friend of mine. One of those found in the madness known as Facebook. This is her second visit to my little alcove. You may remember her previous offering, Dancing within Shadow. Her poetry touched me then, and it continues to do so. Through her poetry she finds a way to paint a story of the pain, discovery and joy of her life. She openly shares her journey so that others may find the strength necessary to seek their own path, their own journey to healing.

Morgan’s work is beautifully illustrated by photos from another friend of mine, Tue Snider. This lady has an incredible eye for detail and can turn the mundane into an amazing inner journey. Who would think that a photo of a drain in a boat house would have artist interest? Somehow, this photographer can and does.

Here are just a few bits of how these artists have managed to create together. I chose this first piece because it speaks to me. I know something of the journey from insecurity and fear to strength and peace.

Fall

When you are hiding
within yourself
afraid to be who
you really are
it is hard to speak
your inner truth
fear is a constant
companion
daring you to trip
daring you to fall
but falling is
the only option
because standing
hurts
too
much

Another one that resonated with me so deeply was “Fire.”  I don’t recall have a circle of friends I could feel this free with; but I do know a few people who can make my heart dance and sing.

fire sm

Fire
Born in the dark of night
slow
moist
and sacred
embrace your brilliant self
wake to your desires
to the blazing morning fire
velvet
soft
wild
open
where the soul remembers
bringing women to the circle
to dance laugh and celebrate.
in the dazzling joy of life

And just one more teaser of Tui’s work, finding extraordinary in the ordinary:

Pic3 2Check out Morgan’s musings, and Tui’s impressions of the world around us. I’m pretty sure you’ll find something just for you.

Morgan Dragonwillow is a shadow poet and recovering perfectionist that strives to inspire other poets and writers. She especially enjoys helping those that have had trouble letting go of the fear holding back their words from landing on the page. It thrills her to her marrow when her words inspire someone to write; it is one of her greatest joys. Morgan released her first poetry book, Dancing within Shadow, in March 2013. She is intimate with shadow and dances into the heart of it. She believes that diving into what most people try to avoid makes great fertilizer for all types of creativity, especially writing and poetry. She writes poetry to be able to say things, feel things that she can’t seem to express or feel anywhere else. Morgan lives in Marietta Ga. with her partner, their Pekinese, and their long haired Tabby. She loves creating of all kinds but words are her passion. You can connect with Morgan from the links below.
Morgan Dragonwillow’s Amazon author page
Morgan Dragonwillow’s Shadow Poet & Author Page: Dancing where others fear to tread.
Facebook Author Page
Pinterest
Twitter

Tui Snider is a freelance writer and travel blogger specializing in offbeat sites, overlooked history, cultural traditions, and quirky travel destinations. She is also a photographer. Her articles and photos have appeared in BMIbaby, easyJet, Wizzit, Click, Ling, PlanetEye Traveler, iStopover, SkyEurope, and North Texas Farm and Ranch magazines, among others. She also wrote the shopping chapter for the “Time Out Naples: Capri, Sorrento, and the Amalfi Coast 2010” travel guidebook. Unexpected Texas is her first book. For Tui, travel is a mindset. Her motto is “Even home is a travel destination,” and she believes that “The world is only boring if you take everyone else’s word for it.” She has worn a lot of hats in her life – literally – and is especially fond of berets. Her first book, “Unexpected Texas” is a guide to offbeat and overlooked places within easy reach of the Dallas – Fort Worth region of North Texas. You can find Tui all around the web.  Tui has been a guest here as well, check out her book Unexpected Texas.

Feel free to say hi:

Tui Snider’s Amazon author page
Tui Snider’s Offbeat & Overlooked Travel blog
Facebook author page
Instagram
Pinterest

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Filed under My Bookshelf ~ Current times, Poetry

Refections ~ The Shapes of Reality

The sky is green
The grass in blue
It’s lunch at 9
And dinner at 2

If we’re hungry
It must be Monday
I’m sure there’s a word
Must be in the laundry

Did he, him or her
Take us to the store?
Am I he, him or her?
I haven’t a clue

Where did it go?
Just a moment ago…
Give it a week
I’m sure it will show

To bed with the sun
We’re up with the moon
The cow ran away
The fork is a spoon

Courtesy WANA Commons, Some rights reserved by cellar_door_films

Courtesy WANA Commons, Some rights reserved by cellar_door_films

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Filed under Caregiving Backstage, Poetry

I am the Captain of my fate…

I remember the days of Apartheid and all of the conflicting feelings I had at the time. Knowing something of the history of the continent I really did want to see those with roots in the deep past take more control without throwing out the generations of people who had lived, worked, bled and died for countries they thought of as their own. Being an American, I understand how deeply I feel for my home even though I know that my ancestors created heartache and pain, and sometimes utter destruction, for those who were here before.  It is my home, not Switzerland, England, Ireland, Germany or Croatia.  I truly know no other than this battered and often arrogant land.

Mandela, I believe,  seemed to understand something of the balance; something of the historical claim of both kinds of “natives.”  He also understood that your victory can be a very vacuous and self-destructive one if, once you’ve won, you do unto others as they have done to you.  He understood that breaking the cycle of hatred begins at home, with “me.”

There is a quote from his life and a powerful film about his early years as a leader. The movie starring Morgan Freemen, Invictus (Latin for unconquered), is an amazing snap shot of a life lived to free a country.   The poem by William Ernest Henley is here quoted in its entirety:

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

We should all remember that – it is a choice, but an important one – to accept responsibility for the choices we make and not place the blame or praise entirely at another’s feet.   Choose to be a force in this world that heals, that supports, that cares. Whatever faith you practice, you choose what kind of impact you make on this world.  Choose well.

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Filed under Humanties for the Unbound Mind, My Bookshelf ~ Current times, Personal Journeys, Poetry

Reflections on what “Networking” is really all about

Sometimes in the wild and woolly world of the Internet and Social Networking, you manage to form lasting relationships with people you may never meet personally, but dearly wish you could.  Since I began my adventure I have found a number of these people.  People I have not met, may never meet, and yet feel that they have become a very special part of my life. Morgan is just such a person.  I am charmed by her input, inspired by her passion and whether or not we agree on things, I admire her gentler touch in bringing issues to the forefront.  When such a person pours her soul out into poetry, I consider it something worth noting.

Starting WedFront thumbnesday, June 19th through Thursday, June 20th,  Morgan will be offering the Kindle version of her book, Dancing within Shadow, for free.  This 2-day event will launch a promotion that will run 7-10 days at which time (drum rollllll) – she will release her paperback version.  There are new poems, photographs, and a brand new cover for both the paperback and the Kindle.

What I love about this little book is that Morgan has expressed some of the pain she experienced in her childhood in such a manner that anyone that has suffered at some point can wrap themselves up in her insight and inspiration.  She provides few details and does not linger long before she moves on to the process of growing out of that pain, growing into something beautiful and fulfilling.  She takes your hand and leads you into her world:

 The Journey Opens

I am diving into poetry to discover

what lies beneath the surface

and between the spaces

of time and me.

Finding much I’ve learned

and much still to grasp

the spaces I find

filling up fast.

Whatever comes into play

I shall discover more

of me I will to see

Divine.

The journey is opening to all

where we take it now

is up to you

and me.

 

When she asked if I would give her a spot on my blog I jumped at the chance.  In return I received a poem written just for my little Alcove:

Reflections of You

Looking into time
looking into your reflection
reflection of colors at sunset
reflection upon the water
water flows with emotion
water flows with images
images taken from memory
images come to life
life filled with choices
life mixed with mistakes
mistakes that you would change
mistakes that turn to dust
dust fills the air
dust makes it hard to breathe
breathe deeply into now
breathe silently into peace
peace can be gained
peace can be reality
reality looks dark
reality can change
change for the better
change can bring joy
joy leads to laughter
joy in the moment
moment in time
moment of solace
solace of mind
solace opens wide
wide into spaces
wide open heart
heart opens to healing
heart opens to love
love brings you together
love makes you strong
strong you stand
strong joined as one
one and one makes two
one and one with you
you shine within
you and I always
always loving you
always and forever
forever in my heart
forever entwined
entwined we are
entwined with you
you and me together
you and me equals love
Love
Together

Morgan is Co-host of @StoryDam and creatrix of OctPoWriMo (a poetry month in October). She is intimate with shadow and dances into the heart of it believing that diving in to what most people try to avoid makes great fertilizer for creativity whether it is writing, painting, or any other form of art.

Writing and publishing her books have been a dream since she was eight years old. She finally made that dream come true last March when she published, Dancing within Shadow. Filled with beautiful photos and art, this poetic journey travels into Morgan Dragonwillow’s troubled childhood to discover her courage, her refusal to be broken, finding love, and the light of transformation. There are defining moments in each of the four sections – Darkness, Rebellion, Love and Light. Morgan Dragonwillow shares pieces of her soul opening a path through the darkness.

Morgan’s creed is rooted in poetry for, “Poetry has anchored into my very being and I find that it draws me back to the page again and again, more than any other form of writing.”

“I don’t know about you but I have tremendous stage fright. What I mean is that any time I have to be in front of people whether in print/words or physically I get extreme anxiety and my brain starts to shut down. The closer to the date the harder it gets. Somehow, between my partner cheering me on and telling me there isn’t anything I can’t do, and me pushing myself to get through it, I come out on the other side.

Is there anything that causes such anxiety in you? How do you get through it? Do you get through it?”

You can find Morgan in a number of places:

Dancing within Shadow Amazon Link is http://www.amazon.com/Dancing-within-Shadow-ebook/dp/B00C100FPC/

Website http://morgandragonwillow.com

Facebook https://www.facebook.com/mdragonwillow.writer

Twitter https://twitter.com/MDragonwillow

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